Every since I became a mother and a wife, my life has become less and less about me. Sound familiar? For my first year of motherhood I was a working mother while my husband was in the Army. I worked between 60-80 hours per week (depending on the time of year). I loved my job, until I became a mother. I despised the guilt I felt everyday when it was time to leave my daughter.
Shortly after she turned one we moved to California. My husband worked from home while I worked a forty hour work week. It was great! I felt I had a lot more time to spend with my child. However the feeling did not last long. Yes, I enjoyed spending more time with my daughter, but something was still missing. It took awhile for me to figure out what it was. I was missing a career. At the moment I was just some one's employee, mother, and wife. I served a purpose to many people. I did not have a purpose that was for, well, me. So for the next nine months I went to school and received my certification in television broadcasting. This of course meant that I was away from my daughter from 8am-11:30pm. Majority of the time she was sleeping when I left and when I arrived home. Sometimes my husband would let her stay up late so she could see me.
Shortly before I completed school, I became pregnant with our second child. My husband was working again, so he thought it would be best if I quit my job and focused on what I really wanted to do in my life. I have to be honest. I quit my job, but focusing on my goals went "out the window". I was consumed with my pregnancy and my daughter, and most of the time I was just out right lazy! I kept putting it off for "tomorrow".
After my son was born, I learned the true meaning of motherhood. He was a constant cryer (with me anyway). I couldn't put him down, not even while he was sleeping. Months later I somehow had him on a schedule that worked for me. I decided to start modeling (it was something I always wanted to do).
I had one problem....I was overweight (too the modeling world). SO WHAT!! I did not care....I was going to model no matter what. I felt that if I waited for everything to be perfect I would never do it. So I told myself I am going to model while I lose weight. I found some photographer who could help me start my portfolio. This what I ended up...
My goal was to show the true image of motherhood (no photo shop here...lol)